Getting Back On Track

It is 3:45 am on Tuesday, March 11th. I would like to congratulate my nephew and his lovely wife on completing their first year of marriage. I hope you enjoy the anniversary and each other today. For everyone reading that has a spouse - call her to say I love you, tell him how much you appreciate him in your life, kiss and re-kiss daily. You never know when the ability to have that intimate moment will be taken away.

Those that know me well would never accuse me of ever having had a normal life. So instead of claiming that I want life to get back to "normal", I will state that I want it back on track. For seventeen years my days were infused with requests from my husband, things that he wanted me to handle. Those petitions ranged from something as small as "please scratch my back" to the hardest and final request "call the ambulance!"

That final plead was on September 26, 2013 and since then none of my days have felt right. It is as though I have been askew, not plumb, sometimes bewildered, mostly off track. Maybe I have done a good job of outwardly looking alright. I have paid the bills on time, made and kept appointments, planned dinners and vacations, bought clothes and cleaned out our closet, but it has all been done through the fog of grief.


The people around me have been great. Friends near and far have been supportive. I have been bolstered by other widows, encouraged by family to try and be happy, advised by strangers to "take it slow" and derided by those that thought I was moving on too fast. The words that I have not heard and I have needed each day, are those three little words that entail so much when spoken from your life partner.

My unsolicited advice for today is to tell those you love how much they mean to you. Also, give everyone the benefit of the doubt. Though they may look fine, you never know what life challenges a person may be going through.
Until later ~ Rita Darlene